What NOT To Say To Someone Who Is Dealing With Infertility And Miscarriage

In my 3 years I have been TTC number 2, I have been lucky to have an incredible amount of support from my family and friends, but I have also heard my share of comments that were a second a way from a knee jerk reaction punch to the face! LOL! If you have been TTC, I’m sure you can relate. In the grand scheme of things, I don’t think most people are intentionally trying to hurt you. I do think many people feel uncomfortable with the subject and don’t know what to say so they say things they think will comfort you and most of the time they do the exact opposite. I have learned that the best thing that someone could say to someone dealing with Infertility and Miscarriage is “I’m sorry” or just listen and be a shoulder to cry on.  A simple hug goes a lot farther then “it wasn’t meant to be.” Here are some of the worst things you can say to someone who is struggling with Infertility or had a Miscarriage(s). Continue reading “What NOT To Say To Someone Who Is Dealing With Infertility And Miscarriage”

“Mommy I Want A Playmate” Dealing With The Guilt of Secondary Infertility

When I was a little girl, one of the questions I got most was “What do you want to be when you grow up?” My answer was A MOMMY! I wanted a big family with 3-4 kids and my mom always used to tell me, “Have one first and then tell me how many you want.” Well, I had one and my answer to her question still remains the same, but at this point I am older and know my ship is sailing quickly, so I pray that I am able to give my son at least one sibling. In an earlier post, “Secondary Infertility and the Stigma Behind Infertility and Miscarriage,” I talked about some of the emotions that secondary infertility bring. One being guilt. One of the reasons I feel guilt is for not being able to give my son a sibling. We are lucky Addison is extremely independent and has never made a big deal about being an only child or really asked for a brother or sister. That is until yesterday! I guess there’s a first time for everything. Continue reading ““Mommy I Want A Playmate” Dealing With The Guilt of Secondary Infertility”

Baby Story My A$$!

After Jesse and I got married at the age of almost 31, we decided to start trying right away. Much to our surprise, it only took 1 month to for us to get pregnant and were blessed with our perfect son Addison 3 months before my 33rd birthday. Yes, I have secondary infertility. Like most women with secondary infertility I never thought I would have issue having another child. In hind site, I wish I wouldn’t of waited to start trying again, but this is where I’m at and the path we are suppose to take. At least that is what I keep telling myself. Continue reading “Baby Story My A$$!”

Secondary Infertility and the Stigma Behind Infertility and Miscarriage

Resolve is the National Association of Infertility and defines Secondary Infertility as the “Inability to become pregnant, or to carry a pregnancy to term, following the birth of one or more biological children. The birth of the first child does not involve any assisted reproductive technologies or fertility medications.”

Yep, that’s me. It’s something I never thought I would be a part of. I don’t know how many times I’ve answered questions like; Is he your only chid and Don’t you want another one? Yes and Yes are my answers. My son is now 7.5 years old and we have been trying for 3 years now. 5 miscarriages, 2 cancelled IVF cycles, 1 failed iui, 5 D&C’s and 1 hysteroscopy later, I am still part of that 30%! Actually, I’m 1% of women because I’ve had 5 losses.

Continue reading “Secondary Infertility and the Stigma Behind Infertility and Miscarriage”

My Story in a BIG Nutshell

When your trying to conceive, one of the greatest joys starts the day you see those two lines on that pregnancy test. I am what they call a POAS (Pee on a stick) addict! I literally have spent hundreds if not thousands of dollars on pregnancy tests in the past 3 years that I have been Trying to Conceive. I wish I had more will power to hold off, but its a REAL problem. The second I see even a squinter, my heart is in it for the long run. Once its dark, that takes me to the next level of hope and dreaming about my next 9 months and there after. Continue reading “My Story in a BIG Nutshell”